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Cartoons link Visual aids title Zacchaeus (harvest)
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Luke 19:1-10

Welcome back, Zacchaeus! Having heard about him a year or so previously, we told his story again at harvest.

During the early part of the service, everyone brought their harvest gifts to the front of church. (They were later given to the Muswell Hill soup kitchen.) Then, just after the speaker had started to speak, Zacchaeus burst in to the church.

'Come on! Pay your taxes!' he said, and proceeded to 'tax' the speaker - relieving him of £5 - and taxing the harvest gifts, taking away a giant packet of Jaffa cakes, a big box of Nut Nut Nutty Nut Nut Flakes and a huge tin of baked beans. This so flustered the speaker that he called for a song and went away to sit down. (He did, of course, know that all this was going to happen.)

Then the speaker stood up to speak again, and Zacchaeus reappeared! The speaker was more wary this time, and told Zacchaeus that he had taken enough on his first visit.

But Zacchaeus told the story about how he had met Jesus, and become a Christian, and was mending his ways, and repaid the speaker £20, and returned the groceries, and gave a lot of other very valuable things - a big teddy bear, a bag of golf clubs, a phone ('have you just upgraded? Is this your old phone?' 'No! That's the new model!') and so on.

The Jaffa cake packet was made from a box that had previously contained a big roll of paper. I painted it blue with poster paint, and drew all the rest with felt pens. Most of the text was just blobs because nobody was going to read it.

The Nut Nut Nutty Nut Nut Flakes packet was an old box that a computer had been delivered in. I painted it white using emulsion paint, and then drew the lettering and Hazel the Squirrel with felt pens. The 'extra nuts' star was printed onto orange paper from the computer, cut out and stuck on. There was more stuff on the other sides - lists of ingredients (every type of nut I could think of), warnings that nuts might be present, recommended daily allowance of vitamin Nt, a competition to win a year's supply of nuts, that sort of thing.

If I was a fussy man, I would say that I wasn't very happy with this one. I quite enjoyed the verbal jokes, but the packet wasn't colourful enough. It should have had a suggestion of green nut trees at the bottom, and shaded woodland walks, and blue sky, and sunshine. There again, you can only spend so much of Saturday making visual aids.

And I had a can of beans to make!

This was made out of a piece of turquoise card, rolled into a cylinder and stuck to two circles of foamboard. I covered the ends of the can with aluminium foil and produced the label on the computer. Other text was drawn by hand; I used a tippex pen for white lettering (not visible in the photo).

You can listen to the talk on the St James's Muswell Hill web site. And there's a special extra - an interview with our new vicar.

Jaffa cakes
A giant packet of Jaffa cakes.

Jaffa cakes other side
Here's the other side of the same packet.
Sadly, the logo on the right hand end should have read '0 cakes'.


Nut flakes
A giant packet of Nut Nut Nutty Nut Nut Flakes.
They're so nutty!

Heinz beanz
Contents: 5kg


Desert island church by John Parker. Contact me via the about page. Text and images copyright © 2014 John Parker www.desertislandchurch.co.uk.